Distractions

Since my last writing, I have pondered distractions all week. Distractions come whether we like them or not and some are actually in our favor.73DD4B77-FA72-445B-B9E7-37CB8160A658

Dealing with a member of the church and her comment of my hair, apparently she is the hair police. It did distract me and started to take over in my worship and concentration. Once I realized though that her comment was a distraction, I settled in and realized Satan just used her as a tool to do so. Nope! Stop right there.

Recently, I enrolled in an accelerated class in the evenings for eight weeks. This all came about months earlier and everything lined up, even the money to pay in full, etc. With that all happening, that truly is a sign from the Lord to do it and do it well. I was excited and my classroom time began.

It was then that my counselor decided to take a leave of absence. A good month before, she had cancelled sessions due to illness but no thought of a leave. Reading my previous writings, I was devastated. I still miss her.

I realized this week though that with me losing my counselor after four years of regular weekly sessions, I was grieving and just lost in my routine, thoughts and tears that just perhaps that accelerated class was a good distraction for me.

While it was hard to focus, and I found myself angry at her but then again understanding her need to care for herself, I had to keep it together and concentrate in order to pass the class. That cycle of anger and understanding in my grieving continued.

If it had not been for that class though, I may have crumbled. So I still see that the Lord had my path all lined out due to her leaving and here I am today. Finished with the class, passing with a higher grade than ever imagined and my grief has lessened.

I am sure you know full well that distractions come from one room to the next. If you are like me, you can walk in one room to do something and be pulled in another direction and forget the main purpose of going in the room. The old joke about being at the bottom of the steps, standing there, wondering if you were going up or just came down. Still makes me laugh, it’s true sometimes.

0D5DE9F1-06E0-459F-95F0-51CBB90CEFBFNow that I am older, post-it notes are the best things ever. I need notes and many I talk to, make notes or to-do lists, don’t forget, etc. With that, another distraction is the mental thought of worry that I am or will get Alzheimer’s.

Well, that thought will bring you down quick. It runs in my mother’s side of the family so it is in the back of my mind. I have to switch that off and not dwell there.

Our lives are so busy with places to go, see and do and our minds are overwhelmed with details that it is easy to be distracted. Life nowadays for so many of us, from young to old, we all get distracted in so many ways. Some more than others as with ADHD or other medical conditions.

It’s having patience with ourselves. Make your lists, use post-it notes or whatever else to take some junk from your mind that you need to remember and feel somewhat free. It’s there in front of you to cross off or get to and takes the pressure off to remember it all.  Makes you feel accomplished as you cross off things from your list, too.

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I find I still tell myself, oh I will remember that, if a thought comes, etc. Nope! I don’t as much anymore, I am older, overwhelmed and going in many directions, probably as you are. I sometimes take a pic with my phone of something I want to check out, so when I scroll through my pics, there it is.

Just knowing distractions come and they will, you make the most of them. Some are good and some not so much.

Funny, I am writing this as it has been on my mind a lot this week noticing the many distractions. Here I am writing and should be up cleaning, doing laundry and I had best get my Christmas decorations out and up before Christmas. Distracted by writing. Here I distracted you by reading.  See, it happens.  Have a productive, fun day.

🎄 Merry Christmas 🎄

Big Ears

Little pitchers have big ears.

“Prov. Children like to listen to adult conversations and can understand a lot of what they hear. (Used to warn another adult not to talk about something because there is a child present.) I started to tell Mary about the date I had on Saturday, but she interrupted me, saying, “Little pitchers C4591558-7ADA-4119-9C48-6DBCCC7A618Fhave big ears,” and looked pointedly at her six-year-old daughter, who was in the room with us.”

Just that one look, numerous times told me as a young child I was in the way and not wanted.  I guess I could almost mind read at that age of get out, you are not welcome, you are in the way and so on and so on.

No wonder I felt rejected and unloved as a child.

472BC27F-D974-4405-B6AF-0AFA1D5EF953Years and years, those words rang over in my mind.  I always thought it was pictures on the wall, as pictures with faces have ears but it is a pitcher because the handle is shaped like an ear.  Go figure!  I just learned that today as I am typing this.

I am sure this was just a warning to the other adult but to a child, it held significance.

While there were times I heard the discussion being had, I don’t remember much.  Although at an early age, I knew that time was a private time usually between my Mother and another, giving advice or just listening to one vent and then the tears would come, Mom calling this time, having church.2424851A-CB4A-4EBF-8B58-12C04CA46657

With each of these church services, as they called it, I knew I was to not tell what I heard.  I learned early on to be private and not gossip, which is not a bad thing.

To this day, I feel that if you confide in me, that is locked in me not to share, ever.  A good quality.

Still, the fact of just now realizing those words and meaning caused great harm to me of feeling rejected.  To look back, I never once had a ‘church service’ as such, in that sense.

EFBA5469-BCD0-4202-B7AC-95C2BC54E40ANow, I understand it’s not pictures but pitchers.  Through many years of counseling on childhood issues, not just about this but it made a huge impact, more than I realized.

Today, I know that I am wanted, I am loved and I can heal from the brokenness within by God.  To deal with this today, and to understand and to know my place, healing can begin moreso and I welcome it.

I still struggle but understanding the root of the problem, I know He is doing a work in me.  I welcome God to heal the broken places within my heart. He loves me like no other.

If this can relate to you, He also loves you, please know you are worthy and He can heal your broken places within, too.  Trust Him!

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