Up Until Now

145F47B7-AD82-4284-AD28-7B1F1C3F5147The world has gone mad. I will not mention anything to cause an uproar in my blog, you watch and hear the news, probably more than I do. Since March, I had a couple of weeks in the beginning that caused some panic within me, but I worked through them.

Thankfully, I had a counselor to teach me how to breathe, pay attention to my breaths. Once I was in my counselor’s office years ago and apparently we were discussing something deep, as I took my right hand and was tapping my collar bone. Until she asked what I was doing, I responded with just tapping. My goodness, that is a thing and I did not even know it. Well, after research since then and understanding this tapping, which is Emotional Freedom Technique and EFT, it actually helped me and I still use on occasion. Then the essential oils used through these panic attacks, was helpful.  Anyway, that was my go-to when life as we all knew it, came to a standstill.  https://www.thetappingsolution.com/

Perhaps I need to start my whole regimen yet again or just put blinders on and live in denial. At times it would be easier to stick my head in the sand.

As I skimmed through some posts on Facebook while in a slow period at work, how can you not cry, pray and want to run away. Run away? Run away, but where to?

The only hope I have is to depend upon the Lord with everything within me, not just for my four and no more but for my family and friends. Our hope is in the Lord, more than ever. Hopefully, your is, too!

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“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.”  Psalm 46:1  

“When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.” Psalm 56:3

 

Take Away

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Day by day, little by little, a bit here and a bit there many things are no longer a part of our lives.

Our normal has been disrupted and the new normal is not comfortable and never will be comfortable.

As we drive past parking lots now empty, especially the ones that are always packed, I find it difficult to comprehend, thinking how odd for that to be possible. My mind knowing all along what is happening but everyday seems like a Sunday, with everything closed. Everything that we have known has changed. I’m old and feeling discombobulated and I can only imagine what the younger generation feels, although some are not taking this COVID19 very serious. I know I am feeling somewhat stripped of more and more each day, as they are taken away. A19CDF5D-0D26-4222-8DF3-E12D0B1CAE2F

Just yesterday, I had two events canceled that I would attend, within thirty minutes of each other. One was in April, which did not surprise me but the other was at the end of May.  Honestly, I found myself angry with all of this happening. Now what?

Fear of one another, wondering if we will get or pass on germs. A disconnect physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

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I noticed my elderly neighbor answer the door to her best friend. Just watching to see how they handled this situation, knowing their routine is off and of loneliness no doubt. The door was not opened immediately, which surprised me in a way but then I wondered if she was afraid to open it. Finally, the door was opened and my neighbor stood on one side of the glass storm door and her friend on the other. They were protecting one another. How sad though to be that close, to miss one another’s company and glass separates the normal contact of one another. No hug was made, no physical touch of comfort to ease each other’s fear and anxiety. 

9C790675-106E-4BEE-91D7-E0BC81576DCCThe distancing between each of us, family, friends, co-workers and each one, is too far apart, although needed right now. It’s like when we put up walls to keep people out of our lives from being hurt, but we are now basically building walls between each of us to avoid contact. Perhaps feeling as though we are lost in a maze. I wonder after this month and hopefully that is enough time, will we be programmed to still limit connection, hesitant to reach out to one another. 

Today is today, tomorrow will be just another day and each one will add up. Yesterday, I had no motivation and unsure about today. I don’t feel depressed although I know it would be easy to be so, but I know anxiety still creeps up on me. How about you?

So, as we have today and each tomorrow will come, let’s make them as best as we can. It is okay to rest, as we recognize that what we are experiencing is not normal and we are not going to feel normal. Still, we will get through this, one day at a time.

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STAY WELL

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40 Beautiful Bible Verses for When Stress & Anxiety Feel Overwhelming