Stress! Stressed! Who me? Who you? We all go through it.
Life just has a way of throwing more on us than we want or need at times. I have someone very dear to me that is in the midst of this stressful period.
Sometimes as it comes, the process of working through it is tedious but manageable. Other times, it is so overwhelming that the mental chaos is too much and shut down occurs. Time to find a balance and regroup. Life.
Knowing I have been in this place so many times and seeing and feeling the weight of it on my son as he builds his business is so hard. As a mother, I want to help, take it off of him and help him maneuver through the chaos but I cannot. All I can do is encourage and support him as he stretches his independence and capabilities. He will get it and be all the better but the heartache grips my soul. He knows I am his biggest cheerleader and he can always lay his head on my shoulder and will have my hugs and prayers.
Overextending oneself is prone to happen and when it does, you think I will never allow that to happen ever again. Well, you do. Each time through that, you do learn a lesson and at some point you look back and realize you did make it through and sometimes laugh at this mountain before you and others in the past were molehills. The pushing through of these times happens and part of growth but feels like hell.
So many times I have been there. I am sure you have, too. I cannot go anymore. I STOP everything. I do not want to see anyone. I do not want to do anything. I do not want to go anywhere. Shut down and hide from the world. I understand where my son is and what he is going through. PUSH!
Usually through these periods, we have forgotten self-care, to enjoy life and play along the way. It happens. We give and take and do for others and we forget ourselves. Then there are times, we play too much and really get in trouble at our own fault and now we must work through and chop away at what is before us. Balance. Get your plan of action together and sometimes a quick swift kick on your backside is what you need. Again, life!
Just do not stay down and give up. Never! My favorite saying is, “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.” That is so true. If you have to visualize sections of that huge elephant before you, an ear is smaller than that leg. Gone. Then attack the next and so on. Whatever works, do it. Chop away and soon it will be such a sign of relief and the heavy weight of this so-called elephant is off your shoulders. Until next time.
Don’t forget yourself. Remember to balance between work and play. Don’t give up. Ever!
When stressed, just turn it around. Desserts. Yes, I think I will.
If you have never dealt with depression, be thankful. If someone near you is battling with it, do not tell them to ‘snap out of it’ as it only makes it worse. Be patient, be a friend. If you are, be kind to yourself.
I have dealt with bouts of depression in life. Many of you reading this may be or may have been or may know of someone in your life that is depressed.
I know what it is like to have each thought in the pic.
I have said, “I’m Fine” way too many times.
I know what it is like to wear a smile when I just wanted to crumble.
I know what it is like to sit in church and nobody realizes the despair I am in.
I know what it is like to want to sleep forever and hope I never wake up.
Thankfully, I knew when it was time to get help.
Having a Counselor, a true Christian Counselor, to talk to has helped me, one that prayed with me at times and I believe for me.
I know, too, “IT’S OK” to have a Counselor and to not feel I have a lack of faith or feel further condemnation.
I know to journal my thoughts and feelings and to work through them. I recommend.
Most importantly, I know to read/study my Bible, trust God and to pray. I totally recommend.
If this all hits home, please KNOW…. God knows your name, He knows where you are, He sees each tear that falls, and He knows the heartache within that you cannot explain. When I understood just that and grabbed hold of it, repeated as necessary, I felt encouraged.
He absolutely loves me (YOU). He cares. ❤️
Take one day at a time and when that is too much, take one hour at a time.
Did I feel like praying or praising the Lord through the depression? No!! Actually, I felt worse as the lies from the enemy were bombarding my mind of unworthiness, etc.
Encourage yourself in the Lord, even if it is just a word (Jesus) or a whisper (I need you Lord Jesus).
Work through this, don’t give up.
Find a Counselor or a trusted friend to confide in.
Trust the Lord. Draw close to Him.
When others let you down, and they will, there is only ONE that you can trust and depend upon.
May YOU be ENCOURAGED!!
But you, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, and the of my head. Psalm 3:3
Info on the photo: esyla designs/Pinterest
“the idea is that everyone has their own battles they face. they say that the biggest lie people say is when they respond “i’m fine” or “i’m tired”. i guess i just wanted to bring this to light or something, because i know so many people who hide things behind their smile.”
I realize people have a good heart and Christians want to witness and make contact with church members and/or friends/family that need to be in church and become a Christian. We are all to show ourselves friendly and to help others.
There comes a time though when it is wrong for a single, divorced woman to text me about my husband’s church attendance and if she can contact him and encourage him. No! What makes me crazed about this situation is that she should know better. We have heard the same messages at church.
How or what would you do?
There are many of us women (wives) that attend church alone, I see it all the time.
I want to text her back and might at some point or see her at church and if asked, say that her requirement as a single, divorced woman should only be to pray for him. For a woman to contact a married man is not okay in my books. This opens up a whole can of worms, as they say.
Whether or not my marriage is perfect is none of her business or others; there is still a marriage license in force.
I’m just floored that she had the gall to contact me but I guess she feels we are friends, close enough that is to either get the scoop or my permission. No! If I was not so nice, I would rip into her. If there is definite contact made, I will.
Sometimes, I just shake my head and this was one of those moments. Crazy enough and just like the Lord, I was questionning her a few months back about an interest in him, figuring it was just a fear on my part. Now, I wonder if that was a warning. No matter. No!
Pay attention to your gut instincts!
If he goes to church with me or not. None of your business. He is a grown man, too, and he has choices of his own whether to go or not. Not mine. Not yours.
As Christians, we are to pray for others.
In passing, to invite to church is one thing. There are other men in the church that should be reaching out to care and witness to other men, not a single, divorced woman. Same with women contacting other women with care and concern. It’s conservative and respectful but for a reason.
Sometimes, I am just amazed at people and crazy enough, church people.
A few weeks ago, while staying in a rented condo on vacation, it takes me a bit to get acclimated to the surroundings and sounds. While it was great to meet up with a friend so we could shop for several days, the night comes. I’m in the back bedroom and she is in the front bedroom near the outside door. I knew she went to bed and as I am lying there in mine, I hear a screeching of a door. I look through the crack of my door to see if it was the front, outside door, while a panic within me freezes not knowing the what if. What if it is the door opening and somebody will enter. Fear.
As I look and try to talk through this situation, I look at the bedroom door and am reminded that there is a cross on the door. Trust Me. Once I realized we were in no danger, the deadbolt was on anyway, I remembered yet again how many times since a child that I have looked at the doors in our home and the Cross. Peace.
The Cross will bring peace to a troubled soul and with fear as it has done all of my life. I love that the six-paneled doors, I see a Cross. I was telling my friend of the screeching sound and my panic mode. She had never noticed the Cross before. Bet she does now. You, too. (Cross and Bible)
As a child, I did not know God but knew enough to recognize the Cross and trust that He had His Hands upon my life.
I need Him in all areas of my life. We all do!
This morning while walking early, as I do often and watch the sun rise over the tree tops feeling the crisp, cool air while I start my day, I often think and pray. Many days, I meet a friend and we walk together. As I was rounding the corner, hitting my first-mile marker, the thought and question came to me as to what is my motive in doing this. Where did that come from, I thought? Lord, what are you asking me with this question so I pondered it as I continued on walking.
Of course, I have a goal in walking to be more physically active, which is so not me until last year but now has become an addiction almost. I have a goal to run, well walk, my first 5K marathon in August and like most of us we walk to lose weight. I am finally at a place in my life, I want better. I want to be better and I want to feel better. That is one heck of a goal, if I say so myself.
Still the motive. I knew right away what it was, although my goals mentioned are good ones. The motive I desire was to be told by this one person that I miss but that they are proud of me. Perhaps one day, I will get the opportunity to see and talk to her once again, which is my former counselor.
This is typical of me to feel this, the little girl inside me, as I have had all my life with what you would call mentors (or mother figures) in my life. We all want others to be pleased with our performance. Plus, I am a poster child for CEN (childhood emotional neglect), I feel and I might as well throw in abandonment.
As a child from a home that you just existed in with no real emotional support or touch, you (or I did) tend to reach out to anyone that will give that need, that mothering, direction, understanding, etc. It was my coping skills all through life of grasping love and attention. Now recognizing since being in her counseling sessions week after week, year after year, how could I not want her to be proud of me. I have spent more one-on-one time with her (well over 200 hours) than I have anyone, whether that be my own mother, siblings, or any family/friends to really know me.
I thank God for her and helping me understand myself after years of questioning what was wrong with me.
While now I understand my motive and goal in my walking, desiring her approval and being proud, but I will continue with or without it. This has been a major change in my life, as well as other areas, and I am moving forward.
Perhaps, just that question while walking, “What is your motive?” was to be reminded that I am worthy and proud of myself. Forever thankful to be where I am at this time in my life.
The Lord will place the right people in your path to get you to where you need to be. You are worthy! Trust Him.
Today I picked up a photo book I put together of pictures and memories from early on to the end of our dog’s life. Neither my husband or I had a dog growing up so getting one along with having young boys, I was asking for more work. What was I thinking? I remember at the beginning, fifteen years ago, this puppy then followed me around the house, just like a toddler. I remember it driving me crazy. I was done with that stage and yet I am back in this mode. The puppy stage! Yikes. Perhaps ignorance on our part, too, and trusting this animal in my house with wood floors and a potty mishap. I was so done.
While my husband and boys bonded with this dog, I had not. With the urine accident, a day off work, we had a meeting of the minds. I told this sweet, beautiful dog that this was not to happen ever again. Strangely enough, it did not. It was that day, we bonded. Just like correcting a child, you correct and then you love. Amazing.
Those eyes and facial expressions tell everything and as time goes, you can understand and know exactly what they want, feel or need. Do they train us or do we train them?
Our schedule through the years were around this dog, getting up to going to bed, potty breaks, walks, food preferences, etc. How can you not love them?
This dog of ours was a rescue and I was the one to find it on Petfinder.com. Still I was the one that was losing my patience with it until that one day and everything changed.
Our days in the last fifteen years were filled with caring for this four-legged animal, but she filled our lives with joy, love and laughter. There were times that when things were not all that great in our home, she would lay at my feet or do something to make us laugh to break the sadness.
As the last few months brought on an oral cancer and having it removed, we knew our days were numbered. Still we felt we had a few months but proved to only be a month, if that, as another tumor occurrence returned. No more surgery, no more pain for our selfishness.
Remember the day I said we had a meeting of the minds and then the facial expressions, too? The day we scheduled to put her down, I had been trying to take pics of her and I wanted one so bad of me and her together. I swear, she looked at me and as if she said, Enough!
I looked at her and said, okay, no more. It was time. I knew she was then ready although we were not, yet we were for her.
Today, is one month and to pick up the photo book from the store, then realizing it is the one-month anniversary, tears rolled and still. Only four weeks but feels like forever ago. I sure miss that dog.
Who rescues who? ❤️