I have a sweet friend that I met in Sunday school, sitting next to me, many years ago and we have been friends since that morning. While we lived miles apart, we managed to meet several times a year to shop and soon developed our routine of favorite stores, etc. On my birthday about a year or two ago, we met and she had a gift for me, a beautiful bracelet of friendship. Soon, she and husband moved further away, in another state. In that last shopping trip together, I gave her a friendship bracelet. This move was good for them but we both missed our girl-time together so we decided to meet half way for a few days to shop back in the spring. What fun it was to get away and enjoy hours talking, laughing, sharing and at times crying. True, best friends. In that time together going from shop to shop, we found bracelets and sure enough we bought the same.
Just recently, while she was in town, we met, shopped and there again found ourselves looking at bracelets. So now we have a new theme to our time together. Bracelets.
It was this last trip that I was telling her about my first bracelet many years ago, that I had forgotten about wearing. Some things in my past, I wanted to forget.
It was back, almost twenty years, I was dealing with some issues that no wife needs to experience or words to hear from her husband. I was lost in the emotional turmoil and nobody to turn to due to shock and shame, thinking maybe it was all my fault. I felt hopeless, ugly, unworthy and whatever negative word you want to throw in this mess I was in and dealing with.
A little girl on our street, about ten years old, would often come to see me when I was out in the yard. I had boys so I was outside with them or checking on them. The girl was selling jewelry for her class at school so, of course, I bought one. I still remember that day, as if it was yesterday.
It was a stretchy soft-color bracelet and I thought how pretty it was and happy I bought it. It was when I put it on to go to church one day, I guess I felt good that day. I put it on, then I realized I felt different. I felt pretty. In shock with that feeling, I took it off, as I noticed a difference in me. I put the bracelet back on and wore it all the time, thereafter. It helped me to feel pretty when I did not feel pretty at all. It gave me a sense of hope in myself when I had rather disappeared in life.
I still have the bracelet. While I do not wear it nowadays, I keep it to always remember where I was then and how it helped me climb through despair. There were a couple of years where I bought or was given bracelets as gifts so I have quite a few.
In those years, I wore the cheap, school bracelet mostly or another here or there but in time I took the bracelet(s) off as well as my wedding rings; I wore no jewelry at all but my post earrings. Done. No need to feel or look pretty. If I had a good day, I knew it was short-lived. No wonder I wanted to forget this period in my life.
It was just a month or so ago, I bought myself a new watch, I slipped on a bracelet with it and again the feeling came, I felt pretty but also knowing I am worthy to wear this bracelet. Isn’t it interesting that just a cheap or any other bracelet can change the thoughts and feelings by wearing it?
Life issues, marriage, relationships, etc., can take all hope from us at times but knowing the One who gives hope is what matters. I gave up on everyone and even God through those years although knowing deep down, he was there for me. He was all I had but I even doubted Him..
Questioning the Lord of why I had to go through everything that I did. He knew that I would question Him. He knew I was and felt hopeless and that I was angry. He knew where I was and what I was going through.
I said this so often and I still do, as it keeps my faith alive: He knows my name and He knows where I am.
You are welcome to use that, too! No matter what you are facing, know that you take one day at a time. Trust Him!