As I was getting ready for work on Friday morning, I heard the text tone I set for my son come through on my phone, which startled me. This child of mine, is not a morning person. Of course, I read the gif shown (Just sending u a note to say… I love you), and was so pleasantly surprised. I was happy, and it was a great start to my day.
I try to give each of my sons their space, as they need to figure life out plus they are adults. Mom is not as important anymore 
although I know they love me and they know that I would drop whatever I was doing and be with them, if needed.
Knowing this past week, I was starting to really miss them and honestly felt forgotten, not needed, etc. You know, those pity-party mom moments. So to receive his text was needed more than he will ever know, even though I did respond back to him of my appreciation and love.
In our daily lives, we all need encouragement if even from a stranger in a smile. It may be the only smile we get. Or even a touch, or a pat on the arm in a conversation. It might be the only 
touch we get. Never to forget, we can and are to do the same. A smile costs nothing but can mean more than money, it brings hope that someone cared enough to do just that small act of kindness.
In a recent situation, I had hoped to get just an ‘I’m proud of you’ from one, which would have meant the world to 
me, to read and re-read those words written back in response to an email. Nothing. I was so disappointed and sad as I sometimes let the negative thoughts roll in my mind. I know not to dwell there but I do at times. Thoughts of I guess they really don’t care, I am forgotten, etc. Again, a pity-party moment or two. It’s okay and we all do it but just don’t stay there. Just be proud of yourself! 
Have you ever had somebody comment on a pretty top or some type of clothing you were wearing? Sure you have. Perhaps I am one to think too much in those instances. Yes, my top is pretty but thinking do I look nice with it on. Take it a step further and being truthful by just saying 
‘you look nice today’ instead of just complimenting the piece of clothing. It changes the whole outlook. Instead of leaving the one questioning do I look nice or not, it might be the only compliment they receive or have received. Watch how they beam and their shoulders are more upright, as you just made that person’s day. Pay attention to yourself when told the same, you look nice today.
With this compliment, some will be shocked and not know what to say. Yes, they should say, thank you, but they were caught off guard, not expecting or have not received many compliments. Don’t take offense, if not thanked, just let the one receive and enjoy your kind words. I have had this said at times and then the one saying I looked nice, then say to me, ‘say ‘thank you.’ While I understand the politeness of saying thank you, it tends to cancel out the you look nice compliment, as now you are correcting me and I am now stuck on that instead of how nice I thought I looked. Make sense? Perhaps just me overthinking. In time though, as confidence builds in oneself, the words ‘Thank You’ will follow. Be patient with them or yourself.
Words play a strong influence in our life, which can lift you up or tear you down.
The text from my son of the gif remind me that he thought enough of me to send and that it said I Love You, will never be deleted. I needed that from him.
Just a note… to another, kind and encouraging words, a smile or a touch brings hope. We all need hope.
Tonight, in between laundry and cleaning around the house, I noticed the movie, The Help, was on so it played in the background. I have seen this numerous times, I also have the CD and have played the song I mention over and over. I tend to do that until I get through a period that I am dealing with and to grasp the meaning, feel the pain and heal little by little.
I finally stopped to finish watching the end of the movie, which brought me back to sitting in the movie theater watching this movie with my sister. Usually, the audience leaves when the words ‘The End’ show on the screen and go on their merry way, as we were doing so, too.
In case you are reading my blog and read through the lyrics and the words hit your heart and feel the pain as it did with me of many years, just know there is HOPE. In my time of feeling totally alone and emotionally distraught, I knew deep down that the Lord knew my name and He knew where I was. I had to hold onto those words and say often. I am living proof that I made it through. You can, too! Trust Him.
I was thinking back when my former counselor discussed my hesitancy for me to even go to the grocery store, I would put it off and cringed as I walk through the store hiding behind the grocery cart. My hiding became worse when my boys went off to college because I had no need to be in the outside world, other than work. Home to work, work to home and hibernate in my bedroom until the next morning. I knew I was depressed but I knew I was also unhappy in my situation and had been. The empty nest wrecked havoc on my life, more alone than ever, no joy and now no laughter existed.
matter, it came down to my weight and the fear of the arena seats. I had my sister go with my husband to the arena with my camera and instructions to take many pictures. My sister and my husband got along great, actually she is the only one in my family that tolerates him, and still. I went to my younger son’s performance. All is well. My sister took many pictures and one was absolutely perfect.
We never know what the next person to us or in our paths are going through. Nobody knew my situation for a long time, even in mine or his family or our friends. I wore the mask well.
Oftentimes, many look at heavy set women, and men, think that they are lazy. Perhaps they are but underneath the layers of fat are layers of pain. Physical pain as well as mental, spiritual but most will be emotional pain. They need hope and encouragement. It is none of our business to have all the details what made them that way, but there is a story behind the emotional eating.
turning it around with weight loss, hours and years of counseling, pushing myself out of my comfort zones, involved in church, groups, etc., walking in 5K marathons, but most of all acknowledging and knowing that I AM WORTHY and that God loves ME no matter. I never could grasp those words and now I do not want to let go of them.
Just Pondering... 