Last night as my sister and I messaged back and forth about this, that and the other, I mentioned all the anxiousness around us. Many are downright panicked with the possibility of being quarantined fourteen days, which affects each and everyone of us. Knowing, too, many work and live paycheck to paycheck, which may or may not be available. Fear of the what ifs come into play. What if I cannot pay my mortgage/rent? What if I cannot pay for electricity, water and food. Now food brings up a whole other fear, as the shelves are bare from day to day. Depending upon how many children are under the roof, adults, pets, etc., the fear increases. Many are thinking maybe they will be okay but many maybe not, as this will definitely be a hardship.
As we continued our messaging, we discussed our churches and if canceled. Neither were canceled but the greeting to one another should only be a smile and a kind word, no handshakes. Many will still hug and shake 
hands, which I plan to observe today and will probably do myself. Another, maybe, maybe not. The fear of being around others right now is on the back of our minds, even though we try to have faith, all will be fine. Probably so. How will you feel when you hear a sneeze or a cough from one within the suggested six foot radius?
So this morning, reading scripture and pondering the word anxiousness, I search the Bible verses for such and tagging along with that is fear and faith. The Bible is full of verses, instruction for each one of us, like He knew this would be a weak link. How about that!
I always thought I had a lot of faith and was optimistic in my life. Yes, there were many times I was not but I always tried my best. Knowing I have had to place my faith in God through the years, He was always there to calm my fears. I’d brush off the negative thoughts, fear and get back up.
Searching and knowing I have and had faith, I had to laugh and remember many of my counseling sessions. While I could put on a good face and encourage others always, being in counseling though, she would see and hear my fears, the anxiousness and cries not knowing what to do. I trusted her enough to let her see the good, bad and the ugly side of me that only the Lord would know of me.
Perhaps that thought was to pull me down, as the enemy would love for me to fall into a pit of despair during this time. Instead I continued on my quest to search the Word of God to increase my faith and decided to write to hopefully encourage you and increase your faith.
What is there to lose except sleepless nights and stress? Trust the Lord with all your heart, mind and soul. Dig your heals in and hold onto His Word. If you just pick one scripture that speaks to you and gives you hope. For many years, and still, the one that has kept me standing was that He would never leave me nor forsake me. With that, I knew I was never alone, even though I had my doubts at times but that was no surprise to Him. Knowing and saying many times, He knows my name and He knows where I am, was and still like my motto. The same is true for you, He knows your name and where you are. He will never leave you or forsake you. He loves YOU!
As we go about life in the days ahead of the uncertainty, whether it be with this virus affecting our daily routine and seeing the panic on faces all around us or in our everyday life once it all settles, just Trust Him.
“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you or forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6).
Isaiah 43:1 “Don’t fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine.”
Luke 12:28-30 “But if God so clothes the grass, which is alive in the field today, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not seek what you are to eat and what you are to drink, nor be worried. For all the nations of the world seek after these things, and your Father knows that you need them.”
The Good News: Let your mind be at ease, God’s love surrounds you.
God actually commands us not to fear, or worry. He knows the enemy uses fear to decrease our hope and limit our victories.
There is nothing more upsetting than a phone call at 3:17 a.m. answering and hearing your son crying uncontrollably. Asking what is wrong? Are you okay? Where are you? Trying to remain calm in order to calm him and his mind but inside I am a total, emotional mess. The sobbing is lessening but he is still crying and expressing what he is going through. Working out of town and being almost three hours away.
Now thinking back of it all and how he was afraid to drive home. Not only fear but shock. While working, he had to focus on his job and was with others, but afterward and alone, it was all when it all hit by feeling it was all unreal but knowing it was real.
I’m ready to turn up my music, flow freely through my house, sing and sometimes dance if I so desire, the cleaning becomes fun, the sound of the vacuum is like a melody, the washer and dryer hum in the background. What a nice time enjoying my home without an energy, draining vampire lurking about.
If I decide to write as I am doing now, the words flow freely and my mind is sharp. So much to do enjoying my time alone, knowing it is short lived so I cherish the moments, as it will soon end.
Lord, there must be more, I have said so many times through the years and You heard the same today. I have come so far and know the light at the end of the tunnel is near. I’m getting impatient so please hurry this along. My age is adding numbers and my strength is becoming less. There is so much I want to do in my time left. I want happiness, I want to feel joy, I just want to have fun and laugh until it hurts. I’m at an age I feel I’ve earned the best of what life has to offer, but I’m stuck and need a few more things to line up.
Just Pondering... 