Little pitchers have big ears.
“Prov. Children like to listen to adult conversations and can understand a lot of what they hear. (Used to warn another adult not to talk about something because there is a child present.) I started to tell Mary about the date I had on Saturday, but she interrupted me, saying, “Little pitchers 
have big ears,” and looked pointedly at her six-year-old daughter, who was in the room with us.”
Just that one look, numerous times told me as a young child I was in the way and not wanted. I guess I could almost mind read at that age of get out, you are not welcome, you are in the way and so on and so on.
No wonder I felt rejected and unloved as a child.
Years and years, those words rang over in my mind. I always thought it was pictures on the wall, as pictures with faces have ears but it is a pitcher because the handle is shaped like an ear. Go figure! I just learned that today as I am typing this.
I am sure this was just a warning to the other adult but to a child, it held significance.
While there were times I heard the discussion being had, I don’t remember much. Although at an early age, I knew that time was a private time usually between my Mother and another, giving advice or just listening to one vent and then the tears would come, Mom calling this time, having church.
With each of these church services, as they called it, I knew I was to not tell what I heard. I learned early on to be private and not gossip, which is not a bad thing.
To this day, I feel that if you confide in me, that is locked in me not to share, ever. A good quality.
Still, the fact of just now realizing those words and meaning caused great harm to me of feeling rejected. To look back, I never once had a ‘church service’ as such, in that sense.
Now, I understand it’s not pictures but pitchers. Through many years of counseling on childhood issues, not just about this but it made a huge impact, more than I realized.
Today, I know that I am wanted, I am loved and I can heal from the brokenness within by God. To deal with this today, and to understand and to know my place, healing can begin moreso and I welcome it.
I still struggle but understanding the root of the problem, I know He is doing a work in me. I welcome God to heal the broken places within my heart. He loves me like no other.
If this can relate to you, He also loves you, please know you are worthy and He can heal your broken places within, too. Trust Him!
The void is still present but being filled and I am allowing just that.
Knowing this is a childhood issue that seems to be on the verge of healing within me but still it just stops in a panic, as tears always begin rolling down my face. I cannot get past this point.
I do believe the Lord places people in our lives at the right time to get us through a path we are walking. As for the counselor, I was not ready for that to end. I felt abandoned. Still dealing with that but to rewire my mind and know it was necessary of this leave for her, I know she still cares and probably wonders how I am doing. I hope so, ant not forgotten.
Understanding and seeing this pattern also, I have people that mean a lot to me, as I am well liked and I am very personable. So I know it is possible.
Just Pondering... 