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Holding It Together?

ponderingmissylouLeave a comment

As  I scanned my Facebook pages today, the counseling/therapy/positive group pages, I am amazed of how many, just today, are on fear and anxiety.  E4744521-880F-438D-9E28-1238D89B698D

While I know this is an everyday occurrence for many, myself included, today they just seem to stand out more.  Perhaps this is a sign, I need to focus more on and get a deeper understanding of what I am going through myself.  No qualms there.

Sadly, these days there are many that are experiencing these emotions and feeling hopelessness.  It’s not just the average Joe out there or those down on their luck, but Pastors, Attorneys, etc.  Nobody is exempt from the thoughts, emotions and even suicide.

Many will say ‘I’m Fine’ but that is not always true. Pay attention if you say it or hear that. We are ones to use that phrase so casually, to ignore what is really happening within or to not bother others. Oftentimes, others won’t bother to ask if that is fact and ask, are you really?  People just need to know somebody cares.
I don’t know where you are in this phase of life or others you may know, but know this, there is help.

Of course, I am going to say God and truly He is there 24/7 and loves you like no other but even with Him, many feel so worthless to call upon Him.  How do I know?  I’ve been there.

Hopefully, just talking to someone whether it be a friend or family member will help but I know that can sometimes be futile, as nobody is available to listen and leaves you feeling more alone.  Again, how do I know?  I’ve been there.  Why try.

If you are able, find a good Counselor that will listen and guide you.  There is nothing wrong if you see one.  Don’t let others place condemnation upon you for taking care of you.  Sadly, church and/or its members are typical of placing this stigma, as in having a lack of faith.  How do I know?  Been through it.

Seeing a Counselor, it will be helpful although not always easy as you deal and dig into areas that you never dreamed was an issue but makes sense of why you may be feeling these emotions.  You know what I am going to say next.  How do I know?  I am presently seeing a Counselor and have been.  I’m taking care of me.

So dear friend, know that what you are experiencing is only temporary.  We will all go through things in life and will feel overwhelmed in areas that can take you by surprise at times. Just don’t stay there.

Practice self-care, get some rest, breathing exercises, go out and walk.  Easier said than done, I know, but it does help.

Life can get overwhelming.  You are stronger than you think. Trust Him!

You’ve got this!
https://www.openbible.info/topics/anxiety_and_depression
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Check your Settings!

ponderingmissylouLeave a comment

48E34A7F-BB5F-4685-9E25-6D467CBCB473Today as I wondered why a normal, daily post from a friend was not showing on Facebook, I wondered and became worried about her and thoughts of what is wrong.       Where are you?  Dealing with abandonment issues in life, I sensed panic within and thoughts start bombarding my mind

Trying to remain calm, I still feel the anxiousness and feel the aloneness.  Surely, there is a good reason but I could not grasp.

It was not until I was at a stop light later after work with this still tossing in my mind and I pulled up her group page.  There she is, and in fact two posts, one being a video.  She was there all along.

After feeling so stupid for the panic I put myself in throughout the day, I realized that this is just like we do in life at times and carrying all our troubles alone.   Sometimes feeling hopeless.   Lost, alone and not knowing what to do or where to go.

We are not alone.  God is with us all the time and there is no need to feel abandoned, afraid, etc.  Our settings in life just get turned off and we feel we can handle everything without Him.  Works for awhile but life is better with Him and He’s been there all the time, which brings peace.  Just like finding my friend.  I had to change my settings.

Trust Him! 4DFA2561-27B9-4FE1-A10C-F2DA1DF4E996

 

 

Unspoken Love

ponderingmissylouLeave a comment

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How or why is it that family members do not speak of love?  To say ‘I Love You’ is hard and/or I guess embarrassing.  I have never figured this out within my own family.  It is that you just know because you know, you are family and you’re loved.  These words are not said.  How sad is that?

Even the thought of asking others in the family if they feel a void in love, is off limits.  True feelings are not discussed. This makes my heart hurt.  My heart has hurt for years of longing for the love that a child/adult should feel or have had received.

Leaving a family member today, my sister, I hugged, and I did say I love you and she just looked at me. Perhaps shocked.  I was thinking and even hoping that those words would be reciprocated but not.  I wonder if they know or feel this, too.

It took years to get this far though.  Before, for years, it was hello/goodbye and no hug so we’ve come a long way baby, as they say.

It is easier to say ‘I Love You’ to a friend than it is a family member.  Why is that?  To get a kiss on the cheek is definitely not going to happen.  I have only a few friends that give me a kiss on the cheek when leaving, along with a hug. Those mean so much. I hold onto those moments.

My children hug me and I cherish those hugs.  They know, too, that this Mom will ask for one more hug before they leave to go home.  It’s just expected, with a grin.  I will always hug them, kiss their cheek and say ‘I Love You’ so they will never have to guess or wonder if I do.  I do!

Never let your child(ren) leave without saying those words to them or while they are in your presence. Hug them, pat their arm or back, as the power of touch is healing.  They need to know you love them. They may pull away or act embarrassed, especially teenagers, but odds are they want that.

Although, if you only do this while in a drunken/drugged state, that will be a definite turnoff.  I don’t blame them, as I experienced that.  If that is the only times of love shown, it is not love.  Just plain sad. It leaves an empty void in a child’s heart and life, always searching for love. The silent screams become so loud within, Please Love Me, but never spoken because it will not be enough.

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