Sometimes words are not audible. There are times our eyes say it all in their sadness and tears may fall or are always welled up within them. Our throat may tense as we take a breath and hold while trying to hold back an outburst of sobs. Everything within is crumbling while you do everything to appear normal on the outside.
I have been through enough grief in my lifetime and I am sure you have, too. Grief of actual deaths and of losses in relationships. No matter, grief is grief. Each new one will bring intense pain that seems to outdo the last one.
The mental and emotional torment takes its toll and then slowly, a daily realization comes that a new normal exists.
Have grace for yourself in the midst of the pain, as often as you need it.
I knew one day that this was a possibility but never hoping it would. I had to pick up a prescription on our way and in just that short distance, the emotions within me could not be contained. Basically, a death has occurred in my life. Flip flop from sadness to anger and back again.
Still, after all of these weeks and months, I struggle in the area of grief missing my counselor in my life due to her medical leave of absence. After four years of almost weekly or bi-weekly sessions, my routine has been distrupted. Today, being Monday, I am still caught in the mix of missing my set appointment this afternoon and our fifty minutes or sometimes more of discussion. I miss talking to her.
Just Pondering... 