Have you ever felt busy in life, events keeping you on the run, appointments, working and getting the job done and whatever else that consumes your day and feel like you are getting nowhere? One day turns into the next, just like that. I’m there.
Many times at my office, my desk is full of files to tend to but one thing or another takes my time, now falling behind with wasted time on meaningless tasks basically. Putting out fires as sometimes put. Exhausting.
Things in my life have taken some turns in the last year or so, some I like and some I do not as well. I need to make some decisions and changes, feeling overwhelmed. Now feeling as though I am not going anywhere and at a fork in the road, just spinning my wheels. Again, exhausting. What do I do?
What will tomorrow, next week, next month or next year look like? You know what? I do not know. None of us know, do we? Life can change in a second. All I know to do and the same with you is to take one day at a time. Years ago, my sister gave me wise advice, which was if one day was too much, take one hour at a time. Honestly, there have been times that I have had to do just that, sometimes a minute at a time.
Making decisions and following through is not easy. Fear can creep in and feeling stuck, afraid to move.
What does the future hold? I don’t know.
My faith in knowing the Lord will guide and direct my steps is what I must depend upon.
So if you are standing at a fork in the road and feeling an unrest within as to what to do, know you are not alone. Trust Him.
“You might not know what it is, but there’s something that doesn’t feel right. And most of us stay stuck in the dissatisfaction of where we are because we don’t know what to do with those feelings.“
I’m a better patient with it.
and I think perhaps this is what dying feels like. It allows me to think and ponder on such instead of what is happening in my mouth. While that brings a sense of joy, I know I am deep in the flow of it all now but then a jolt of panic hits me thinking what if I am dying here in this chair. Thank God I do not do drugs, this is all I can handle. The glow, the nitrous glow, is only the fluorescent light in the ceiling and the light shining on my mouth as he works. Still, I wonder if the light will shine so bright on my face one day when I do die.
all the troubles and stressors of my life in this time. Music, especially those songs that are meaningful anyway, become surreal and tears will flow down from the corners of my eyes to my neck dropping teardrops on my dental napkin or clothing. I wonder if the assistant sees my tears flow thinking if I am in pain. If she only knew my joy, as the song goes deep into my soul, knowing that God knows all about me and feeling what a precious time it was to know of His presence while in the dentist chair being tortured by ‘my man’ so my smile will remain.
Of course, the nitrous is over, the effects of his handiwork are being felt as the numbing is wearing off. I have a feeling I will feel this for a few days. I need more nitrous, I miss the glow. Just pass me a pain pill, I’ll make due.
I definitely remember being just that… young and stupid. A lot of things could be said, but I got through and learned some major lessons, some the hard way. So I try to remember my youth and the rebelliousness and my ways when listening to my son with his thoughts and plans recently.
within, while trying my best to remain calm, was when I withdrew my retirement.
One day, the roles will be reversed by them taking care of me and making decisions on my behalf and odds are, I will not listen to them or be happy with some decisions made or worse. Guess I better keep my mouth shut now.
Just Pondering... 