This morning I had an appointment early to get my 
haircut and was looking forward to a nice, productive day afterward as I prepare for Thanksgiving like many of us are doing. A good morning overall even though the weather was not cooperating with a lack of sunshine.
Here I am, sitting in the chair and my sweet stylist doing her magic while we talked and laughed. In the background, Christmas music was playing and the song, Pretty Paper by Willie Nelson came on. I stated I had not heard that for a good year, since last Christmas, of course, making a joke. I knew with that comment, I could not hold back the emotions and the tears started. Where did those come from and why? It’s funny how memories are stirred by music and our emotions are affected.
“Each tear we cry has meaning to our Father God. He keeps track of all our sorrows just as carefully as if He were gathering each tear and placing it in a bottle for His remembrance.” Jennifer Rothschild
Later, when home alone and starting to clean, I turned on the Christmas music, louder than normal with my sound bar and woofer level elevated, hoping the neighbors don’t 
complain. lol Believe it or not, the first song was Pretty Paper by Willie Nelson, yet again. What is up with this song today? Just because of how odd and what happened earlier, I texted my stylist and told her. Her text back was that it was playing right after I texted her. Knowing we are not playing the same channels but for this to coincide, interesting for both of us now.
Christmas music is wonderful even when the tears start flowing. The lyrics go deep and touch our hearts. Once they start, they usually continue off and on for the day for me and sure enough today has been one of those days.
The holidays can bring up memories of our past, good and bad, the grieving of those no longer in our lives whether that be in death or an end of a relationship, being overwhelmed with many things going on in our lives, or a mixture of it all and the tears flow, but not necessarily depression.
When my son moved out of state after college, being five hours away that year, I found the song, I’ll Be Home for Christmas a definite one to make the tears flow, which always reminds me of him still even though now an hour away. This song is not so good when driving to work and tears fall like a dripping water faucet. Why did I even put on makeup?
Feeling sentimental, as many of us are if not all, at this 
time of the year, is normal. It is a time for families and friends to come together. With the Birth of Christ recognized, our worship and joy felt can also bring tears of thankfulness. Let your heart feel, allow your emotions that apparently are needed to cleanse and heal some areas within. It’s okay to cry, even in your hair stylist’s chair. I grew up feeling shame and embarrassment of crying in front of others, even my own family. Thankfully that has changed in understanding myself and the whys through counseling.
If you find the tears are more than not and on the depressive side instead of sentimental reasons, please contact your physician, a counselor, a pastor, a friend. Reach out! It does takes courage but you can do this.
If more serious and nobody is available or you want to remain private, as many isolate during this time, please get help by going to your nearest hospital or call the suicide hotline. You are worthy and God knows your name and where you are and most importantly, He loves you. Trust Him!
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org 👉🏻 Telephone 1-800-273-8255 24/7
The Story Behind Willie Nelson’s Christmas Classic, ‘Pretty Paper’
I’m leaving on a jet plane, don’t know when I’ll be back again.
Life can be overwhelming and we can be consumed with hopelessness in situations. If you make no changes in your circumstances, nothing will change. We have to make a decision to want more. I seriously started with this change back in 2014. It seems like forever ago but there was a lot to sift through and I do not regret the time spent, financial aspect or the emotions expressed. I am not the same person I was when I walked in my counselor’s office the first day, back in September, 2014. I had to and you have to make a decision to start taking care of YOU. Nobody will do this for you.
I have noticed this week and now that it is the weekend, I had a sink of dirty dishes and even a pile of clothes on the end of my bed. I told myself each time that I would hang the clothing item up when I got home from work, which did not happen.
If you have dirty dishes, piles of clothes, laundry, etc., just start somewhere. Organize your bedroom, a bathroom closet, etc. If you do not or have not used something in a year, get rid of it (give away, donate or pitch). Something! Just start. It will help you feel somewhat productive even if overwhelmed.
sentence. Make plans to search out a counselor. With that and when you do and go, please give him or her a chance, as one or two visits won’t do it. They, too, are getting familiar and comfortable with you as you are them. Of course, after a month or so, if it is not a good fit, there are others, don’t stop. Perhaps go see your family doctor and know there is nothing wrong with taking an anti-depressant. Your mental health is just as important as your physical health. The stigma of mental health needs to stop and be recognized — moreso today, than ever.
Sadly, with all that I wrote and recommended, many in my church family would be appalled, stating I did not have enough faith. Sad! I do have faith, enough to know when I need help and that the Lord will lead and direct me to the right counselor(s), which He did. I have come a long way and still a long way to go. It has not always been easy but I am allowing Him to heal the broken places in my heart and life with a counselor’s help. I’m a better person and a Christian with faith renewed because of my decision to get help years ago.
Just Pondering... 