How many times do I have to say or write a post-it note so that he will get it? This drives me absolutely insane. Perhaps that is the plan. Hmm…
We live on a street with apartments and new people move in all the time, some of not so great reputation. While the last few months have been quiet, that was not always the case due to drug dealers, drug busts, fights, etc. I have the pictures to prove up to ten police cars, fire trucks and ambulances at one time, at various times. What fear it brings when pulling into our short, dead-end street to see all these emergency vehicles in front of my home and in my driveway, at times, too.
It has been nuts and one weekend, about a year ago, I placed heavy blankets on our front windows so we could move about in our own home. Not a good situation to live in fear within your own home. Thankfully, that wild, drug-dealing group is gone.
The buildings are in bad shape, which is another reason rent is so cheap that keeps this situation reoccurring time after time. The buildings cannot last much longer, although I have been saying that for years. I have hope! For us to move, we could end up elsewhere with same issues plus I like my house.
So, my husband goes out to mow and tend to the yard. He goes out the front door, leaving it unlocked while working in our backyard. Nowadays, you do not leave your house unattended to, such as a garage, front door unlocked, etc. This is not Mayberry anymore. Still, today I just walked in, unlocked door, and he is in back mowing. Fear hits, more times than others, of what could be or could happen. As many times as we have had this conversation, it is a lack of respect for me and my safety, I feel.
Having someone in my home back many years ago when I lived with my parents and while I was home for lunch, not knowing but gut instinct, it all started to add up days later with things missing. I remember thinking my parent’s bedroom door was closed more than usual and thought that was odd. Realizing later, he probably was behind the door. It brings a violation of our privacy and fear. My husband knows of this incident and of my concerns. Still he repeats.
As you and I both know, drugs will cause people to do whatever. While I may not have the perfect ten for a body and with my age but thoughts of rape are there, as I am still a woman and I have heard worse incidents of such. To be hit and knocked out in order to steal, shot or even killed is not uncommon these days. When I am home alone, I keep my doors locked. Not necessarily out of fear but just common sense.
There is a movie that I enjoy watching called, The Help. Odds are you have seen it, too. The young girl opens the door and goes into the office for an interview and then when she leaves and the boss screams both times, ‘shut the damn door’ so I think of that scene and hear his voice each time I walk into my unlocked house but thinking or saying, ‘lock the damn door.’ In my frustration, humor is needed.
No matter where we are, whether it be in our homes, out walking or shopping, vacation, in the car, etc., we must pray and trust the Lord to put a hedge of protection around us.